Saturday, September 5, 2009
So today was a great Saturday. It started with a men's breakfast.. traditionally early morning. Then I went to my usual ritual of washing my truck, which is very relaxing. Then off to Lakeland... the day was relaxing, Trish drove on our way back and let me sleep. Recovering from the men's breakfast no doubt. We had an exceptional time at 'The proposal', very funny. So in the course of this day I have managed to feel exceptionally down. I don't know why, maybe it's just the time of life where you do the same thing over and over and over and it occurs to you what you are doing. For some reason I hate doing the same thing over and over. Why is it that it is in some peoples nature to naturally flow into a routine, it appears to be like a warm bath. I have such a hard time doing that. Sometimes I'll take a way home just because I'm sick of going the usual way. Just because I love change. It's a blessing and a curse. Probably started as my life became more performance oriented as I grew up. I heard a quote from Eleanor Roosevelt: "Do something that scares you everyday." I like that. I hate that. It requires a level of passion I admire but have no idea how to perform it. Fear Paralyzes me sometimes. I cling to safety when something that scares me is being exacted from me. Oh, I'm such a brave coward.